I suppose if there would ever be a way to make a joke about a wheelchair this would be it.
This isn’t funny, you say? Why would July to me?
Do you Juan a good laugh?
A face only a cat could hate
“Love me, I bite!”
Actually two cats. Her sisters.
Our new little Christmas present has stolen the hearts of everyone in the family, except our two cats. Big surprise.
Funny thing about cats is that they are very curious. So as much as they hate our little Kyro, they are very interested in what she is up to. In fact, they seem to spend most of their time watching, lurking and probably plotting her dimise.
Kyro’s not deterred. She just wants to be friends and play. This doesn’t help matters, of course.
I imagine midnight meetings between the two miniature black panthers on the bathroom sink whispering death wishes upon their invader like Nag and Nagaina the two cobras from Rikki-Tikki-Tavi.
Cat be like, “you ruined my domain so now I must revenge on you.”
Cats are kinda like people, or so the internet keeps trying to convince us. They spend way too much time worrying about others.
My advice: Don’t worry, be puppy.
This time, I swear
I love cereal. I could eat it 3 meals a day.
I also love entrepreneurship. I could start a new business after each bowl of cereal every day.
And so it seems during the holiday’s I get extra ambitious, that and I usually take more time off work, get bored and want to start something new.
So I finally decided it is okay for me to refer to myself as a…
SERIAL ENTREPRENEUR.
Some of my ventures have been mildy successful, one successful and most the others had the market appeal of Frosted Cracklin’ Sushi-O’s. The SERIAL designation reflects quantity not quality.
Thus I am just a few days away from launching my newest, best-est, biz to date.
So put down your spoons and savor my newest solvence.
I promise this is the dawning of a new tastey market opportunity. This time, it’ll go over better than a bowl full of shell-fish shaped sugar shards wrapped in puffed sticky rice.
Until then, Cheerio!
Do what makes you happy new year?
I can’t decide if I find it more funny than sad or vise versa – this whole, “Do what makes you happy” trend.
Part of me wants to believe that people don’t actually buy it. But I’m probably wrong. It’s a way, I guess, for people to justify their selfish ways.
Narcissism.
Life is tough. Suffering, sadness, disappointment are not anomalies in life, happiness is. Get used to it and be thankful in your daily and constant suffering because it makes you tough enough to make it through.
So, even though we like to wish everyone a (air quotes) Happy New Year (air quotes) you are going to have a tough, rough and disappointing new year, but try to be happy anyway.
It’s not about DOING what makes you happy. You can’t avoid pain. It’s about BEING happy even when things go wrong.
Trust me, they will.
Top 5 suggestions to stay Toastmaster-sharp over the holidays
If you are a member of a Toastmaster club, here are a few tips while at home this holiday season. If you are not a Toastmaster, JOIN! It will be the best decision you can make for your career.
Here are my Top 5 suggestions to stay Toastmaster sharp over the holidays:
1.On Christmas Eve, instead of reading the story of Jesus’ birth from the Bible. Act it out in speech form using lots of vocal variety and animal noises!
2. Play table topics before you let the kids open presents. “Ok Johnny, please tell your parents the worse thing you did wrong this year.”
3. After Christmas dinner, give a timer’s report on how long it takes everyone to eat dessert. And be sure to count ice cream headaches.
4. Give a grammarians report on how well grandpa said grace. “Is it Ahmen or A-men?”
5. After all the gifts are open, give a general evaluation of each present. And be sure to say something positive, about the ugly sweater given to you from your Aunt Ruth.
And yes, I did make these up. I presented these at our club meeting before Christmas this year and got a very positive response!
Tell a better story
I recently read a short little marketing book that I really liked. It is by Bernadette Jiwa. I call her the female Seth Godin. Check out her book to see why…
Make Your Idea Matter: Stand out with a better story
In it she makes a list. I love lists. How many of these do I do? How many do you do? It gives me a goal.
20 ways to tell a better brand story
1. Name and claim a new category
2. articulate what you do without being boring
3. Give people a great back story that explains why you exist and put it on your About page in your bio and profiles, in your other marketing materials
4. Back up the story by doing great work
5. Concentrate on speaking to customers with a particular world view
6. Paint a picture of the world as it is
7. Then show the audience the world as it could be
8. Uncover of the essence of a problem and tell the story about how you solved that
9. Appeal to all senses. Stories aren’t just written or spoken
10. Use a variety of media to convey your message. Show and tell.
11. Have a singular purpose and make yourself known for that.
12. Consider what one person says to another to recommend your product, service or project. Make it easy to share
13. Speak to your customers heart, not just their head
14. Optimize your website for visitors who want to return, not just traffic that’s passing through
15. Tell people how and why you are different
16. Avoid using jargon. Simple language works, so write as you would speak.
17. Don’t smooth away all the rough edges. Be human and authentic. Honesty travels farther than perfection.
18. Be consistent. Everyone in your company must understand your mission and the story you want to tell.
19. Give your customers the opportunity to tell the story and feel apart of it too.
20. Don’t try to be the next (blank). A flawed original is better than a perfect imitation.
Very Godin-y. I love it. This list is really a nice way to summarizes the whole idea of telling a story with your product or business.
Here’s your problem, and mine.
Scott Adams of Dilbert fame has recently published a book called, How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big: Kind of the Story of My Life
Wow, I am so messed up. Oh and you are too.
BTW, I wasn’t a huge fan of this book. I think it is neither terribly funny, interesting or insightful. However, it did have it’s rare moments.
Here’s something you might not know about Lou Reed.
Lou was one of the Original Wrappers…
Wow. I guess everyone in the 80′s had to give rapping a shot. Not something Lou is know for, but still funny, sad and interesting. And what’s an 80′s music video without roller skaters?
BTW, Lou Reed considered himself the inventor of Punk Rock music.
R.I.P.
Stop, just stop.
I find this disturbing for all the wrong reasons.
Can we just stop with the nazi tactics already?
Second hand smoke is nothing but a myth. But now we need to be concerned what are neighbors are up to?
What? This sounds harmless to you? Smoking is bad, right? So does that mean people shouldn’t even be aloud to do it in their own homes? Ok, fine.
What’s next? I’ll tell you what’s next.
It’s something you do.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that
This sportscaster made 41 Seinfeld references within his sportscast.
Get out!